BASH your life!

11/27/2007 4:08 AM (#22) | Rating: 4 | Click here to give a one star rating!4 | Click here to give a one star rating!4 | Click here to give a three star rating!4 | Click here to give a four star rating!4 | Click here to give a five star rating!Click the stars to vote!
on IRC

<DeathStar> i have to flick my balls so the cum comes out
<DeathStar> fuck wrong channel
<DeathStar> ignore that please
<Draebor> haha

10/21/2009 11:04 PM by Dekar (#1416) | Rating: 20 | Click here to give a one star rating!20 | Click here to give a one star rating!20 | Click here to give a three star rating!20 | Click here to give a four star rating!20 | Click here to give a five star rating!Click the stars to vote!
on Jabber / Google Talk

ozzapoo: Hey
ozzapoo: All the computers on the school network just started playing some dos-like music
ozzapoo: In sync
ozzapoo: An it even happens during the login screen
ozzapoo: Wow
ozzapoo: Any ideas what it is? Lol
ozzapoo: Lol
ozzapoo: All the computers playing mario song
ozzapoo: Hilarious

06/26/2011 9:36 PM (#1491) | Rating: 12 | Click here to give a one star rating!12 | Click here to give a one star rating!12 | Click here to give a three star rating!12 | Click here to give a four star rating!12 | Click here to give a five star rating!Click the stars to vote!
on some other network, wc3edit chat

(00:01:27) UndeadxAssassin: /quit Nuuby
(00:01:2 ChatBot: Nuuby has been logged out (Kicked).
(00:01:31) ChatBot: Ban of user Nuuby revoked.
(00:01:33) magicianx126: ???
(00:01:36) Hobbeskiller: LOL
(00:01:41) UndeadxAssassin: Anyone can do it!
(00:01:50) syle222: even me?
(00:01:55) UndeadxAssassin: Yes, try it
(00:01:56) ChatBot: syle222 logs out of the Chat.
(00:01:57) Hobbeskiller: yea
(00:02:00) Hobbeskiller: LOL
(00:02:05) ChatBot: magicianx126 logs out of the Chat.
(00:02:06) UndeadxAssassin: I am such a troll ;_;
(00:02:10) UndeadxAssassin: TWO
(00:02:11) UndeadxAssassin: !

07/02/2009 2:31 PM by Victor (#85) | Rating: 19 | Click here to give a one star rating!19 | Click here to give a one star rating!19 | Click here to give a three star rating!19 | Click here to give a four star rating!19 | Click here to give a five star rating!Click the stars to vote!
on Jabber / Google Talk, This is about CUTIE, THE ELECTROCUTING EEL :-D

(14:20:16) ozzapoo: Btw, love the worm
(14:20:25) Dekar: worm?
(14:20:28) ozzapoo: wait
(14:20:29) ozzapoo: what is it?
(14:20:33) ozzapoo: your mascot
(14:20:37) Dekar: you tell me
(14:20:48) ozzapoo: no idea =/
(14:20:49) ozzapoo: snake?
(14:20:51) Dekar: -.-
(14:20:52) ozzapoo: python?
(14:20:56) Dekar: -.-
(14:20:57) ozzapoo: eel!
(14:20:58) ozzapoo: OH YEAH!
(14:20:58) Dekar: :D
(14:20:59) ozzapoo: :D
(14:21:05) ozzapoo: lol
(14:21:09) ozzapoo: im an idiot XD
(14:21:12) Dekar: man it has lightning
(14:21:18) ozzapoo: lol

05/13/2011 4:19 PM (#1487) | Rating: 18 | Click here to give a one star rating!18 | Click here to give a one star rating!18 | Click here to give a three star rating!18 | Click here to give a four star rating!18 | Click here to give a five star rating!Click the stars to vote!
on IRC, #freenet-chat

<toad_> freenet isn't big enough for it to be a big player in 0day child porn
<toad_> people say bull about it but i seriously doubt it
<dekar_> well propagation time is too slow for 0day anyway XD
<toad_> 1day? 30day? :|
<dekar_> haha

11/29/2009 1:30 AM (#1421) | Rating: 20 | Click here to give a one star rating!20 | Click here to give a one star rating!20 | Click here to give a three star rating!20 | Click here to give a four star rating!20 | Click here to give a five star rating!Click the stars to vote!
on ICQ, wc3edit.net

(19:21:23) UndeadxAssassin: /quit
(19:21:24) UndeadxAssassin:
(19:21:33) UndeadxAssassin: Kiska, bet you can't type that .
(19:21:42) ChatBot: FatherSpace logs out of the Chat.
(19:21:44) xkiska: i bet i can bitch
(19:21:45) ChatBot: FatherSpace logs into the Chat.
(19:21:45) ChatBot: xkiska logs out of the Chat.
(19:21:47) FatherSpace:
(19:21:47) Dekar: -.-
(19:21:50) Tupac_Shakur: XD
(19:21:50) FatherSpace: lol
(19:21:52) UndeadxAssassin: XD.
(19:21:55) ChatBot: xkiska logs into the Chat.
(19:21:56) xkiska: fukc you
(19:21:59) Bartimaeus: LOL
(19:22:01) Tupac_Shakur: win
(19:22:02) Bartimaeus: XD
(19:22:12) Bartimaeus: Hey, Xkiska, you didn't type it.
(19:22:16) Bartimaeus: Try again.
(19:22:18) xkiska: yeah i did
(19:22:19) ChatBot: xkiska logs out of the Chat.
(19:22:23) ChatBot: xkiska logs into the Chat.
(19:22:23) Tupac_Shakur: HAHAHHAHAHA
(19:22:24) Bartimaeus: lol

03/09/2009 10:49 PM (#75) | Rating: 20 | Click here to give a one star rating!20 | Click here to give a one star rating!20 | Click here to give a three star rating!20 | Click here to give a four star rating!20 | Click here to give a five star rating!Click the stars to vote!
on IRC, FreeNode #gnunet

<dekar_> skype -.- those asses piped the money from my account to /dev/null

09/17/2010 2:09 AM by UndeadxAssassin (#1457) | Rating: 13 | Click here to give a one star rating!13 | Click here to give a one star rating!13 | Click here to give a three star rating!13 | Click here to give a four star rating!13 | Click here to give a five star rating!Click the stars to vote!
on some other network, wc3edit chat

(19:12:33) Bartimaeus: Hmm, well, I hope my sister hasn't been kidnapped.
(19:12:36) UndeadxAssassin: CONNECTION 403 AGAIN?!
(19:12:39) UndeadxAssassin: wut
(19:12:48) FatherSpace: What happened, Bart?
(19:12:48) UndeadxAssassin: Bart that's so random o.o
(19:12:58) GeorgeMots: oh w/e lets troll
(19:13:02) UndeadxAssassin: xD
(19:13:07) UndeadxAssassin: Bart's more important ;o
(19:13:21) Bartimaeus: She walked out of the house saying that she was going over to some friends, and it's been like two hours, and my mom is trying to get a hold of her, which she's been unable to.
(19:13:27) Bartimaeus: I can also hear three car alarms going off.
(19:13:28) UndeadxAssassin: o.o
(19:13:45) GeorgeMots: how old is she?
(19:13:52) UndeadxAssassin: Older than Bart ;o
(19:13:56) Bartimaeus: I haven't a clue. Probably 17.
(19:13:58) AbusivePie: Are kidnappings common in Germany?
(19:14:00) AbusivePie: Wtf
(19:14:00) UndeadxAssassin: wut
(19:14:06) AbusivePie: You don't know how old your sister is?
(19:14:09) Bartimaeus: Nope.
(19:14:10) UndeadxAssassin: Epic fail
(19:14:15) GeorgeMots: is she cute?
(19:14:17) AbusivePie: My brother is 24
(19:14:23) UndeadxAssassin: I saw that coming.
(19:14:25) GeorgeMots: :D
(19:14:29) Bartimaeus: Sure, but that doesn't make up for her...fiery...personality.
(19:14:33) AbusivePie: He said Jen was around his age o.o
(19:14:38) UndeadxAssassin: I don't think George cares ;o
(19:14:40) AbusivePie: But i dunno how he knows how old you are...
(19:14:47) Bartimaeus: By sure, I mean I'm her brother and I'm entitled to say it.
(19:14:48) Bartimaeus: :P
(19:15:08) AbusivePie: You are entitled to say she is cute?
(19:15:11) Bartimaeus: so that's not saying I'm not asexual.
(19:15:13) GeorgeMots: Its not really a problem the personality
(19:15:20) Bartimaeus: Sure, if someone asks.
(19:15:23) Bartimaeus: On the internet.
(19:15:25) AbusivePie: O.o
(19:15:29) AbusivePie: Bart are you cute?
(19:15:30) UndeadxAssassin: George, you depress me.
(19:15:31) Bartimaeus: Actually, on the internet, I should probably say she looks like an ogre or something.
(19:15:43) GeorgeMots: :D
(19:15:52) UndeadxAssassin: And yet, I totally saw it coming.
(19:15:59) UndeadxAssassin: You should hook up with Dekar's sister!
(19:16:10) GeorgeMots: Dekar has a sister????
(19:16:13) AbusivePie: I hear she gets people wet
(19:16:18) GeorgeMots: Nice
(19:16:23) UndeadxAssassin: She got Dekar wet ;o
(19:16:25) Bartimaeus: Yeah, Lanaya, GeorgeMots.
(19:16:28) UndeadxAssassin: ew
(19:16:41) UndeadxAssassin: Don't make fun of Dekar like that ;o
(19:17:01) ChatBot: caiocarv logs into the Chat.
(19:17:04) Bartimaeus: K, she wasn't kidnapped.
(19:17:09) FatherSpace: Hooray!
(19:17:11) caiocarv: hello
(19:17:13) AbusivePie: Good to hear o.o
(19:17:13) FatherSpace: Anyway, I'm quoting you, Bart.
(19:17:16) Bartimaeus: I guess.
(19:17:22) Bartimaeus: On what, FatherSpace?
(19:17:31) FatherSpace: (19:13:56) Bartimaeus: I haven't a clue. Probably 17.
(19:17:37) Bartimaeus: lol
(19:17:45) GeorgeMots: :P
(19:17:55) AbusivePie: Jen, was your age ever correct on this site?
(19:18:07) UndeadxAssassin: "(21:22:43) Dekar: there was this drunk guy going postal with some garden water sprinkler - totally wetting my sister
(21:22:51) Dekar: and some others I didn't care about
(21:23:01) Dekar: what did she do? come over and hug me
(21:23:14) lichistheman: I smell incest.
(21:23:34) Dekar: incest? she just made me totally wet XD"
(19:18:15) UndeadxAssassin: George is interested ;o
(19:18:28) UndeadxAssassin: Uh
(19:18:30) UndeadxAssassin: Mehbe
(19:18:31) FatherSpace: I'm tempted to add an extra line from George.
(19:18:40) UndeadxAssassin: I've been 21 since I've been on here o.o
(19:18:43) FatherSpace: (19:14:15) GeorgeMots: is she cute?
(19:18:43) Bartimaeus: I thought his real sister hated him.
(19:18:53) AbusivePie: ehh my brother said it showed you as 24 ;o
(19:18:56) GeorgeMots: I could say something about wet but dekar would ban me
(19:19:00) Bartimaeus: And was insane, like his mom,
(19:19:01) AbusivePie: like 2 years ago
(19:19:17) GeorgeMots: @fs: i dont mind, it would be funny
(19:19:24) FatherSpace: Right.
(19:19:31) ChatBot: caiocarv logs out of the Chat.
(19:19:46) ChatBot: caiocarv logs into the Chat.
(19:19:47) FatherSpace: ONE QUOTE, TWO HUMOUROUS BITS! IT'S LIKE HAVING YOUR CAKE AND EATING IT TOO!
(19:19:53) UndeadxAssassin: I should find you the picture of her that he posted ;o
(19:19:54) AbusivePie: Bart's sister is too young for me
(19:20:03) UndeadxAssassin: Not for George xD
(19:20:15) GeorgeMots: 14 and more is good
(19:20:21) AbusivePie: >.>
(19:20:34) Bartimaeus: I have a TF2 scrim in an hour. Blargh.
(19:20:40) AbusivePie: I'm guessing there is no statutory rape in Greece
(19:20:41) FatherSpace: Bart's sister is old enough for me, but I'm taken. And Bart would skullfuck me.
(19:20:44) UndeadxAssassin: So, George, you interested in Dekar's sister?
(19:20:44) UndeadxAssassin: ;o
(19:20:46) UndeadxAssassin: I have her pic
(19:20:58) Bartimaeus: lol
(19:21:02) GeorgeMots: send it
(19:21:06) UndeadxAssassin: WARNING! |cFF000080ESB uses a name spoofer.
(19:21:09) UndeadxAssassin: damnit banlist
(19:21:12) AbusivePie: lol
(19:21:15) GeorgeMots: lol
(19:21:16) UndeadxAssassin: http://forum.wc3edit.net/main-f1​5/quit-it-already-t18570-40.html#​p132813
(19:21:23) UndeadxAssassin:
(19:21:32) GeorgeMots: ...
(19:21:39) caiocarv: Hello guys
(19:21:40) GeorgeMots: i prefer that alien lanny posted
(19:21:42) Bartimaeus: LOL.

12/26/2009 1:52 AM by 2Pac (#1432) | Rating: 26 | Click here to give a one star rating!26 | Click here to give a one star rating!26 | Click here to give a three star rating!26 | Click here to give a four star rating!26 | Click here to give a five star rating!Click the stars to vote!
on some other network, wc3edit.net

(01:51:13) UndeadxAssassin: "You could say that rap is missing a c"
(01:51:17) UndeadxAssassin: "wtf is rapc?!"
(01:51:27) UndeadxAssassin: "No, you idiot. You put it in the front!"
(01:51:31) UndeadxAssassin: "Oh, I get it. You meant crap"
(01:51:40) UndeadxAssassin: "Well, I suppose you could always add an e"
(01:51:44) UndeadxAssassin: "wtf is erap?!"
(01:51:45) UndeadxAssassin: xD

01/15/2010 0:58 AM by Bartimaeus (#1438) | Rating: 17 | Click here to give a one star rating!17 | Click here to give a one star rating!17 | Click here to give a three star rating!17 | Click here to give a four star rating!17 | Click here to give a five star rating!Click the stars to vote!
on Real Life

Here is another one from my dad.

Dad: So, there's these two guys in a bar near the top of the Empire State Building. Both guys have been drinking quite a bit. The guy in a blue shirt says to the other guy, "Dude, do you know that if you jump out of this building, there's air currents going around the building, that when you get near the bottom of the ground, they'll stop you, and push you back up into the fifteenth floor?" The other guy is like, "No way, dude. If you think I'll even THINK about trying that, you're crazy!". So the guy in blue says, "Come on, I'll show you." So, he opens a window, and jumps out. He's falling, falling, falling...and right as he's about to hit the ground, he stops, and then is pushed up by the air currents, and into a window on the fifteenth floor. The other guy is watching, sees it, and meets the guy in blue as he's coming up the elevator. Guy in blue says, "See? I told you." Other guy: "No way, man. There's no way that's going to happen again. That was just some fluke...there's just no way...". Blue guy says, "Come on. I'll show you." So he jumps out again...he's falling, falling...and once again, he stops right before he hits the ground, and is shot up from the air-currents into the fifteen floor. They meet back up at the bar, and the other guy is like, "Oh my gosh...that's CRAZY. I'll have to try it." So the other guy goes towards the window, breathing heavily...and jumps. Falling, falling, falling...SPLAT. The guy in blue is looking, and shakes his head. The bartender says, "You're an asshole when you're drunk, Super Man."