BASH your life!

04/20/2010 2:58 AM by Dekar (#1444) | Rating: 18 | Click here to give a one star rating!18 | Click here to give a one star rating!18 | Click here to give a three star rating!18 | Click here to give a four star rating!18 | Click here to give a five star rating!Click the stars to vote!
on Web, chat.wc3edit.net

FatherSpace: hay guis
FatherSpace: e
FatherSpace: Except nobody's here, and I'm gonna look dumb now because I can't delete messages.
ChatBot: (206249) logs into the Chat.
(206249): hey dumby :D
FatherSpace: /whois (206249)
ChatBot: User (206249) - IP address: x.x.x.x
FatherSpace: Go register/log in.
(206249): you wish!
FatherSpace: k, then I'll kick you or something.
(206249): what's the something?
FatherSpace: Kicking you.
(206249): so you kick me or you kick me?
FatherSpace: Log in, or I ban you from chat for 10 minutes.
(206249): if you do I'll kick you!
FatherSpace: See you in 10.
ChatBot: (206249) has been logged out (Kicked).
ChatBot: Dekar logs into the Chat.
Dekar: re
ChatBot: FatherSpace has been logged out (Kicked).
ChatBot: Ban of user FatherSpace revoked.
ChatBot: FatherSpace logs into the Chat.
FatherSpace: I'm so sad now...
Dekar: XD

03/09/2009 10:49 PM (#75) | Rating: 18 | Click here to give a one star rating!18 | Click here to give a one star rating!18 | Click here to give a three star rating!18 | Click here to give a four star rating!18 | Click here to give a five star rating!Click the stars to vote!
on IRC, FreeNode #gnunet

<dekar_> skype -.- those asses piped the money from my account to /dev/null

01/15/2010 0:58 AM by Bartimaeus (#1438) | Rating: 15 | Click here to give a one star rating!15 | Click here to give a one star rating!15 | Click here to give a three star rating!15 | Click here to give a four star rating!15 | Click here to give a five star rating!Click the stars to vote!
on Real Life

Here is another one from my dad.

Dad: So, there's these two guys in a bar near the top of the Empire State Building. Both guys have been drinking quite a bit. The guy in a blue shirt says to the other guy, "Dude, do you know that if you jump out of this building, there's air currents going around the building, that when you get near the bottom of the ground, they'll stop you, and push you back up into the fifteenth floor?" The other guy is like, "No way, dude. If you think I'll even THINK about trying that, you're crazy!". So the guy in blue says, "Come on, I'll show you." So, he opens a window, and jumps out. He's falling, falling, falling...and right as he's about to hit the ground, he stops, and then is pushed up by the air currents, and into a window on the fifteenth floor. The other guy is watching, sees it, and meets the guy in blue as he's coming up the elevator. Guy in blue says, "See? I told you." Other guy: "No way, man. There's no way that's going to happen again. That was just some fluke...there's just no way...". Blue guy says, "Come on. I'll show you." So he jumps out again...he's falling, falling...and once again, he stops right before he hits the ground, and is shot up from the air-currents into the fifteen floor. They meet back up at the bar, and the other guy is like, "Oh my gosh...that's CRAZY. I'll have to try it." So the other guy goes towards the window, breathing heavily...and jumps. Falling, falling, falling...SPLAT. The guy in blue is looking, and shakes his head. The bartender says, "You're an asshole when you're drunk, Super Man."

12/22/2007 10:58 PM by Dekar (#38) | Rating: 12 | Click here to give a one star rating!12 | Click here to give a one star rating!12 | Click here to give a three star rating!12 | Click here to give a four star rating!12 | Click here to give a five star rating!Click the stars to vote!
on Web, http://redscull.com/forum/

dove_kitty: you a bad man i dun likes you!
Dekar: I don't like you, too. :P

02/08/2008 2:35 AM (#48) | Rating: -13 | Click here to give a one star rating!-13 | Click here to give a one star rating!-13 | Click here to give a three star rating!-13 | Click here to give a four star rating!-13 | Click here to give a five star rating!Click the stars to vote!
on MSN

Why cheat dota when you can just stop playing it altogether?

Its a shit game anywa

01/24/2011 1:20 AM by UndeadxAssassin (#1476) | Rating: 11 | Click here to give a one star rating!11 | Click here to give a one star rating!11 | Click here to give a three star rating!11 | Click here to give a four star rating!11 | Click here to give a five star rating!Click the stars to vote!
on MSN, AIM

Deckharr 6:49 pm
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Mj0HDN82Pfo
that's so... weird O.o
Jenny 7:05 pm
That has to have bad side effects...
Deckharr 7:05 pm
she pretends it wouldn't have any
only half of the yearly dose or something
Jenny 7:06 pm
I wasn't aware I got any technectium in me at all...
Deckharr 7:06 pm
but the sounds the geiger counter made before - and makes after...
lol sure - me neither I guess XD
Deckharr 7:07 pm
at least not that weird isotope :?
but it sounds like a pretty uncommon element anyway
I liked when she spoke about how hard she irradiates everyone around her XD
Jenny 7:09 pm
I suppose I could say the same thing after drinking some barium sulfate
Deckharr 7:09 pm
I would shake peoples hands and then show them their increase in radioactivity :D
Deckharr 7:09 pm
so what is barium sulfate anyway?
Jenny 7:09 pm
You would probably start mass hysteria
It's just an ion that attaches itself to any active cell in your body and emits radiation
The radiation is picked up by a machine
Deckharr 7:10 pm
neat
I think I had something like that
Jenny 7:10 pm
They use it in PET Scans
But that's all, I believe
Deckharr 7:10 pm
was some stuff I had to drink and then they like X-Rayed me
don't remember it that much, but it tasted weird to horrible
Jenny 7:11 pm
Very horrible.
Deckharr 7:11 pm
it was white and I had to drink like half a liter
is it that stuff?
Jenny 7:11 pm
Lots of things are white, but generally BaSO4 is, yes
Deckharr 7:12 pm
also when it came out again it totally killed the toilet XD
Jenny 7:12 pm
o_o....
Deckharr 7:12 pm
I remember my mom being really angry about it
XD

02/05/2013 2:42 AM (#1516) | Rating: 13 | Click here to give a one star rating!13 | Click here to give a one star rating!13 | Click here to give a three star rating!13 | Click here to give a four star rating!13 | Click here to give a five star rating!Click the stars to vote!
on some other network, wc3edit.net chat

(20:41:40) UndeadxAssassin: I'M LOVE YOU, BART.

02/16/2010 5:46 AM (#1440) | Rating: 14 | Click here to give a one star rating!14 | Click here to give a one star rating!14 | Click here to give a three star rating!14 | Click here to give a four star rating!14 | Click here to give a five star rating!Click the stars to vote!
on some other network, wc3edit.net chat

(19:19:34) Bartimaeus: YouTube is retarded.
(19:19:50) Bartimaeus: I try to sign up, and it says the name hasn't been taken already.
(19:20:13) Bartimaeus: I hit the submit button, everything goes...and then they ask if I have a Google account.
(19:20:30) Bartimaeus: I say, "nope", and then they say the name is already taken.
(19:20:48) UndeadxAssassin: Who needs to sign up, lol
(19:20:51) Bartimaeus: I'm like, "Um...okay...I might've created it in the past, dunno", so I try to reset the password.
(19:21:01) Bartimaeus: And then they say the account doesn't exist.
(19:21:04) Bartimaeus: wtf.
(19:21:19) UndeadxAssassin: Ownfaced.
(19:22:42) UndeadxAssassin: o.o
(19:22:56) Bartimaeus: ZOMG. Now it says that my account name is already in use.
(19:23:12) Bartimaeus: And the password I chose is incorrect.
(19:25:34) Bartimaeus: This is retarded.
(19:25:40) Bartimaeus: Now I can't get my name back.
(19:25:41) UndeadxAssassin: So is this
(19:25:46) UndeadxAssassin: I have NO idea what I'm doing.
(19:25:57) UndeadxAssassin: Baertimaeus, then!
(19:25:59) Bartimaeus: lol
(19:26:12) Bartimaeus: What're you doing, anyways?
(19:26:21) UndeadxAssassin: Or....BarrTimAyuz...?
(19:26:30) UndeadxAssassin: Anatomy o.o
(19:26:43) Bartimaeus: Bar-Tim-Ay-Us.
(19:26:49) UndeadxAssassin: UZ
(19:26:55) Bartimaeus: Wait. May-Us.
(19:26:55) UndeadxAssassin: And BARR
(19:27:15) UndeadxAssassin: BrattyMaeUZ
(19:27:16) UndeadxAssassin: o.i
(19:27:26) Bartimaeus: Gosh, forget this. That guy can remain ignorant.
(19:27:28) UndeadxAssassin: zz one of my eyes shrunk on accident
(19:27:44) Bartimaeus: How am I bratty?
(19:28:02) UndeadxAssassin: Uh.
(19:28:02) UndeadxAssassin: idk
(19:28:03) Bartimaeus: Wait, we need to start a new conversation without this context.
(19:28:17) UndeadxAssassin: It was a typo once and it suck
(19:28:22) UndeadxAssassin: stuck*
(19:28:32) ChatBot: FatherSpace logs into the Chat.
(19:28:32) Bartimaeus: Yeah, one hand typing is a pain, (even though that's not what you're doing).
(19:28:37) FatherSpace: Barty!!
(19:28:41) Bartimaeus: I know from my bloody nose rampage.
(19:28:45) Bartimaeus: Hiya, FatherSpace.
(19:28:56) FatherSpace: Finally you actually get in chat...
(19:28:56) UndeadxAssassin:
(19:29:10) UndeadxAssassin: He doesn't say hi to me when you';re in here D:
(19:29:11) Bartimaeus: You do have me added on Messenger for a reason.
(19:29:13) Bartimaeus: ._.
(19:29:20) UndeadxAssassin: zz typos give me headaches.
(19:29:21) FatherSpace: Doesn't everyone?
(19:29:27) UndeadxAssassin: BACK TO WORK
(19:29:28) Bartimaeus: Well, jeeze, of course he doesn't. He's sucking up.
(19:29:29) UndeadxAssassin: BLAH
(19:29:33) Bartimaeus: Lol, ok.
(19:29:50) Bartimaeus: My leg is asleep.
(19:30:24) Bartimaeus: Jeeze, I have to stay up like another five hours, and I'm already ready to fall asleep.
(19:30:54) Bartimaeus: And I woke up REALLY late today.
(19:31:26) Bartimaeus: Gosh, YouTube sucks.
(19:31:32) Bartimaeus: HOW DO I CREATE AN ACCOUNT!?
(19:31:47) Bartimaeus: It goes back between saying my account already exists and that it doesn't.
(19:31:53) FatherSpace: At the top-right, it says "Create Account" in bold letters.
(19:32:01) Bartimaeus: I know, but it doesn't work!
(19:32:16) FatherSpace: Well, you probably just fail hardcore or something like that.
(19:32:21) Bartimaeus: No doubt.
(19:32:44) Bartimaeus: I tried signing up, said my account name was free, then I tried completing it, and it said it already existed.
(19:32:50) Bartimaeus: Tried to reset password, but then it said account didn't exist.
(19:32:53) Bartimaeus: WTF?
(19:32:54) FatherSpace: Waily.
(19:33:12) FatherSpace: What's the username?
(19:33:16) Bartimaeus: NordomW
(19:33:29) FatherSpace: It doesn't exist... Probably.
(19:33:33) Bartimaeus: Now it says that the account is already in use.
(19:33:45) Bartimaeus: But it didn't before, and it's not the password I deisgnated.
(19:33:51) Bartimaeus: designated*
(19:34:22) FatherSpace: brb
(19:35:32) Bartimaeus: wtf?
(19:35:44) Bartimaeus: It says an email was sent to ********@********.com.
(19:35:48) Bartimaeus: WTF DOES THAT HELP WITH?
(19:35:58) Bartimaeus: THAT'S NOT EVEN THE EMAIL I USED TO SIGN UP WITH.
(19:36:08) Bartimaeus: At least not with all those asterisks.
(19:37:02) ChatBot: FatherSpace has been logged out (Timeout).
(19:37:03) ChatBot: FatherSpace logs into the Chat.
(19:37:07) FatherSpace: Grrr me smash!!
(19:37:12) FatherSpace: Firefox is being icky to infinity.
(19:37:28) Bartimaeus: WTF!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
(19:37:34) Bartimaeus: It's trying to reset my GOOGLE email.
(19:37:53) Bartimaeus: I want to fix my friggan' YouTube, my email is fine!
(19:39:55) Bartimaeus: Okay, so I reset my password.
(19:39:59) FatherSpace: We should get Bart fixed...
(19:40:13) Bartimaeus: I accidentally mistyped the second confirmation of the password, and it still accepted it.
(19:40:25) FatherSpace: How do you know you mistyped it?
(19:40:33) FatherSpace: Maybe you didn't, but you just think you did?
(19:40:34) Bartimaeus: Because it was one asterisk short.
(19:40:45) FatherSpace: Wow... Epic fail.
(19:40:55) Bartimaeus: It was lined up perfectly with the one above it, and it was one short.
(19:41:00) Bartimaeus: And I still hit enter, and it accepted it.
(19:41:34) Bartimaeus: So I reset it again.
(19:41:36) Bartimaeus: lol
(19:42:38) ChatBot: FatherSpace has been logged out (Timeout).
(19:42:39) ChatBot: FatherSpace logs into the Chat.
(19:43:01) Bartimaeus: Why does it keep trying to reset my Google password when I want it on YouTube?
(19:43:17) FatherSpace: Doesn't they be linked or something?
(19:43:29) Bartimaeus: They use different accounts, so it shouldn't matter.
(19:43:51) Bartimaeus: When I hit, "reset password" on YouTube, I except it to reset my password on YOUTUBE, not GOOGLE.
(19:43:58) Bartimaeus: I go to GOOGLE to reset my password on Google.
(19:44:14) Bartimaeus: No wonder I don't haven account on YouTube.
(19:44:22) Bartimaeus: have*
(19:45:09) FatherSpace: *have an
(19:45:17) Bartimaeus: Oh, yeah.
(19:45:18) Bartimaeus: lol.
(19:45:33) Bartimaeus: I can't even resign up on YouTube, because it says it's already in use.
(19:45:40) Bartimaeus: WHEN IT CLEARLY SAYS THAT THE ACCOUNT DOESN'T EXIST AT THE SAME TIME.
(19:45:47) FatherSpace: Bart smash!
(19:46:46) Bartimaeus: That was the only name I had that wasn't taken.
(19:47:14) UndeadxAssassin: I got 100% on my online quiz !
(19:47:29) Bartimaeus: Alright, then you should be able to help me think of another name.
(19:47:35) UndeadxAssassin: o_o
(19:47:36) Bartimaeus: Make me a cool name, UndeadxAssassin.
(19:47:43) UndeadxAssassin: JennyRulez
(19:47:46) UndeadxAssassin: Done.
(19:47:47) UndeadxAssassin:
(19:47:57) Bartimaeus: ...
(19:47:59) UndeadxAssassin: DEKAR!
(19:48:09) ChatBot: reeree logs into the Chat.
(19:48:11) Bartimaeus: Already taken, lol
(19:48:39) reeree: AlphabetSoup
(19:48:45) reeree: lol
(19:48:47) UndeadxAssassin: Taken by some guy in Singapore o.o
(19:49:02) reeree: FootUpYourAss
(19:49:03) Bartimaeus: Already taken, as well.

07/28/2010 4:21 AM (#1454) | Rating: 11 | Click here to give a one star rating!11 | Click here to give a one star rating!11 | Click here to give a three star rating!11 | Click here to give a four star rating!11 | Click here to give a five star rating!Click the stars to vote!
on IRC, wc3edit chat

(22:19:22) UndeadxAssassin: Lanoob should leave if he likes men ;o.
(22:20:10) ChatBot: Lanaya has been logged out (Timeout).

06/09/2009 0:06 AM by Hillo (#81) | Rating: 14 | Click here to give a one star rating!14 | Click here to give a one star rating!14 | Click here to give a three star rating!14 | Click here to give a four star rating!14 | Click here to give a five star rating!Click the stars to vote!
on Web

ALICE: I can't believe it.
Human: I can
ALICE: Who taught you?
Human: jesus
ALICE: Jesus ist der Sohn Gottes.
Human: why are you talking german ?
ALICE: The topic is a noob.